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Jello Biafra

I don't want to see San Francisco's spirit muzzled in the name of law and order and tourist dollars.

I will ban automobiles, legalize squatting in unoccupied buildings, auction off all high city government positions, clean up market street by requiring downtown businessmen to wear clown suits and tear down Pier 39.

Police officers should be required to run for election. The neighborhoods they patrol would vote yes or no confidence.

I will ease tension in the city by erecting statues of Dan White throughout town. The Parks Department will sell eggs, stones and tomatoes to throw at them.

Campaign poster
Mayorial Campaign Statement (Biafra finished fourth with 3% of the vote)



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On This Day in SniggleryNovember 24, 1987: Tawana Brawley stages an assault and disappearance that leads to some seriously twisted political theater. (See Guerrilla Hacks for more info)